21
Jun
13

Lonely Potato

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I couldn’t help but indulge myself in a moment of self pity last night. As I snuggled up close with my fleece blanket to fall asleep, I realized – I’ve been sleeping on my couch. Not because I don’t have a bed. But because my California King bed is too big for my loneliness to handle. Every stretch reminds me of how no one is there next to me. I can roll over and over and over again before I run into Buster, my overgrown stuffed dog who is usually somewhere half on the floor and half on the wall trapped by the bed.

It came to me last night, why I have slumbered on my couch the last few days. It’s because if I press against the cushions just right, it feels like a hug. I know that sounds crazy, but if you’re buzzed, sleepy and apparently desperate enough – the imagination can do powerful things. I’m not sure what this man drought is all about, but I do know that between Spring fever and Pride month and the libido these herbal supplements have kicked in – I’m in serious romantic movie watching, ice cream eating, exasperated lovelorn sigh mode.

I’m trying to keep busy because I’m feeling like one lonely potato. And it is not a good look. Crazy how you can live a life that keeps you surrounded by people – and still feel so alone.

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